Luahan nun jauh di Lubuk Hatiku~

frankly speaking, i had such a difficult time this week.. why? maybe its all because of my hormon yg x stabil.. biasalah.. alkisah pompuan.. i dunnoe why perasaan sya minggu ni sgt2 bercelaru n i;m so sensitive this week.. weirdo.. yaa.. mmg sya jenis yg teramat sensitive but i never thought leh smpai jd gni.. mood sya mo marah orang ja.. even my adik2 pun kena tempias mood tak stabil sya ni.. lol.. padan muka lar..

yaa.. i try to control perangai sya yg tidak menentu but, ntah.. APA2 jer lar Korg nak ckp.. this is me.. susah jgk kan kalo ada perasaan cmni.. FYI, sya mmg kuat jeles.. n jeles sya ni mmg x bertempat.. terus terang sya ckp, sya boleh jeles bila sum1 trying tuk berbaiik2 ngan parents sya, berbaik2 ngan adik2 sya, rapat ngan cuzen2 sya, even kawan2 sya.. bila dah cmtu, sya rasa terasing n cm sya x guna uda.. sya x suka org lain dilayan lebih berbanding sya.. [ceh.. dasar tamak!] n thats y ada certain tym sya jeles.. (tp tgk keadaan jgk lar) biasanya, sya malas mo amik kisah.. but bila dah lama pendam n berdiam diri, perasaan tu mcm belon jgk lar.. semakin lama di tiup, akhirnya akan meletup jgk kn.. takda org yg selamanya boleh bersabar.. melainkan kalo pokok kayu besi.. dorg mn ada perasaan..

ee.. sya paling TIA SUKA lar CARI PASAL ngan orang.. bilang kata mak bapak sia, pndai2 jaga diri, jaga pertuturan.. mmbha.. iya lar.. [even kadang2 sia merambang ja taip di wall sya ngan WORDS yg agak KETERLALUAN].. xD~.. smpai my mum pun comment 'mcm budak2 ja'.. lol.. belum matang lg bha pulak sia ni.. adeihhhh~!

apa lg ah? apa2 ja lar.. terpulang lar pa korg nak ckp, nk comment.., korg akan paham jgk perasaan cemburu GILA ni bila kamu dah mulai sayang org.. =).. skrg sya paham y some of my friends bersikap cmni dulu.. even sya pun penah kena tempias kejelesan org.. RUPANYA BEGINI PULAK RASANYA.. kalo dulu, yaa.. ..mmg sya tak kisah suma tu.. sya xkisah everything.. lantaklah nk bercommunicate ngan sapa pun.. i dont care.. tp bila perasaan sayang itu makin dalam.. naa.. jd lar gila seperti saya dan mereka [kawan2 sya yg lain] yg ckit2 mo jeles.. ckit2 mo jeles.. arghhh!! i dun like this feeling.. i dont like this negative feeling yg melampau2! tulah dulu tau ckp org, dlu tau mengomen org jeles x tentu pasal.. last2 terkena batang hidung sendiri prasaan ni.. PADAN MUKA KO LAR AZWANI!!! KARMA!

terus terang sya ckp, perasaan jealousy ni sangat annoying.. yupp.. msa sya tgk kwn2 sya yg terlalu overboard jealousy dorg; sia benci betul nmpak.. n sya rasa suma tu mengada2.. ckit2 mo jeles.. ckit2 mo jeles.. ngan kwn sendiri pun mo jeles.. ngan cuzen sendiri pun mo jeles.. dgn org pun mo jeles.. ngan adik sendiri pun mo jeles.. suma org akan rasa rimas ngan perasaan ni.. baik yg merasainya, mahupun terkena tempiasnya.. i really hope that ia akan hilang.. tp tak boleh.. once u give all ur heart to a person, smpai bila2 it will stay.. [malas mo atur ayat] apa2 pun, sya sgt berterima kasih kepada semua yg terlibat kerana memberi sya pengalaman ngan perasaan baru ini.. SERIYES sya ckp ni.. BUKAN bermaksud MENYINDIR.. cuz lau bkn skrg, BILA LAGI.. =).. n lepas feel perasaan ni, sya rasa amat bertenaga n sangat GEMBIRA.. TIDAK.. sya TIDAK GILA.. tp mmg ini KEBENARANNYA..

SYA AMAT BERSYUKUR KERANA TUHAN MEMBERIKAN UJIAN yang boleh dikira THOUGH lar jgk TUK SYA MERASAINYA.. hidup bagaikan roda.. kadang2 kita di atas, kadang2 kita di bawah.. Akhir skali, SYA INGIN MEMOHOM MAAF sekiranya perasaan sya ni ada membuat org TERASA n TERSINGGUNG.. MINTA MAAF SANGAT2.. i hope it all ENDED TODAY! -tamat-

2010?

hye again.. n happy belated new year 2010.. haha.. masa berlalu dgn pantas, so fast and i almost forgot that i have blogs to update.. well.., this year, i'm kinda busy with my study n my life til i dun have time to update nor post anything here.. kinda bored to type n write too... ahh.. whatever.. the past is past.. just let the wind flew it all away.. =)..

but TODAY, memandangkan tugasan2 yg memerlukan kami buat kat skola da selesai, i feel free to start blogging again.. [padahal 5 ASSIGNMENTS blum siap!!] hoho..

ACT, i feel a bit jealous lar cuz my sist started 2 blog n everyday, she'll never missed to post her daily life lar kununnya d blog dia.. then my 'b' pun tba2 wat blog.. pe kene ngan dorg ne tetiba excited wat blog.. so.... tuk xnak lar ketinggalankan.., sya pun start menaip n berceloteh ntah pa2 kat blog ni.. [masih blur lg pe nak taip].. >.>''..

*tgh berfikir*

owh.. iya.. this week.. [29 august - 3 september], sya jlnkan PBS [Pengalaman Berasaskan Sekolah] d SK ina6 laut.. aa.. urrmm.. pa lg sia mo ckp ni.. speechless tahap gaban ni..

*berfikir lg remembering what happen during PBS*

Hah.. nak tau tak? sya mengajar kelas tahun 2 MATHEMATICS.. uhh~ dahsyat! maths kan skrg in ENGLISH, so i have to teach the pupils in english lorhh.. dengan penuh confidentnya sya masuk kelas n speaking~ yupp.. lancar for 10 minutes i guess.. last2 bercampur2 jgk ngan bm.. miahahahhahahaha!!! kunun~~

best gak lar mengajar.. tp tulah, perlu persiapan rapi.. sya buat cmna tu? last minute! sok mo masuk kelas, mlm ni baru wat RPH n cari bahan2 BBM.. hahaxX! lembaran kerja pun 1 jam b4 masuk kelas baru mo buat.. padahal, orang len buat n finished it all 1 week b4 PBS lg.. =).. this is me n this is who i am.. thx 2 all yg telah membantu secara langsung n tak langsung..

k.. during my teaching n learning process, everything is under control except for the noises that the pupils made.. bising! i cant talk loudly cuz ngam2 tym tu i'm not feeling well, coughing n fever = xda sora daa.. adeiii.. sib bek ada mentor sya tolong kawal kelas jgk.. so, everything is done well.. i guess lar.. walaupun ada 1 slot tuk individual task 4 pupils tu x smpat buat akibat kesuntukkan masa.. hoho!~

Enjoy this game.. =)

I was browsing for interesting games n i found this flash game on a gaming website called Reflexive.com. Try this:

Being Silent

After being silent about 5 months.., Now, it's about tym 4 me to update my blog.. rite?

haihzz.. a lot of things happen n i dunnoe how 2 explain it.. tErlalu byk dan terlalu complicated..

It's juz a beginning of my life lar i guess..

My day today wasnt so gud.. exam in da morning juz now was terribly EASY [4 those who study hard].. N 4 myself, sorry.. i really dun have da mood 2 study last night.. N i'm NOT WORRY at ALL.. CRAZY!!

Last nite, i supposed to study from early in da morning [after i woke up] til mid nite.. but.. u noe what? I'M JUZ A LITTLE GIRL CAUGHT IN THE MIDDLE.. =P..

I woke up, went to my desk n turned on d laptop n started to surfing FB! OMG! I think i'm addicted 2 FB already.. n i began to forget bout FS, MS, n so on.. lol..

Noon, i eat n eat n continued eating at room.. We did talk about d exams n spots but...hahaha.. neither one of us want to start study yet.. We watched SUPERNATURAL n forget bout d exams.. then suddendly, [tiba2.. jeng3x..], me felt sooooo SLEEPY.. So i went back to my room n started sleeping~!! zzzZZZzzZZZ...

[mcm karangan lar pulak]

Selamat Pengantin Baru~

Buat my cuzen a.k.a our abg ehsan,

selamat pengantin baru n semoga bahagia ke anak
cucu cicit piut miut.. (^^,)

Majlis Persandingan kat Rumah Pengantin Perempuan,

Kg. Pimping, Membakut.

Kat umah pihak lelaki.. haha.. petang ne.. lepas abih majlis.

Dgn Pengantin Perempuan, ahli baru dlm kuarga.. ^^,

Cuzens 4eva~ ^^.

Nahh.. the rest..

Holiday at Nexus Resort Karambunai

I got a phone call from my mum at 4pm (sumthin lyk that lar)..
"Be prepared.. When i come, we terus jalan.. suruh yg len sedia"..

Me got weird 4 a sec.. go where oo??

nvmd, then i sedia2 my barang2..
then my mum smpai..

"where r we goin mum?"..

"Nexus..".

"Woaahhhh~! Great!!"

Lama da sya mengidam mo stay sana..
it's been a long tym since 2003

[this is where we stayed]

reach there on 7pm..
smpai2 trus baring..

then turned on my laptop..
connecting via Celcom Broadband..

n chat wif my friends..

suddendly..

i heard sumthin outsite da window,

i walked n opened da door,

OMG! I saw da blue ocean!!

[mlm x brapa nmPak lar]..

then i heard da sound of -ombak-

[dunnoe what in english.wakaka]

wahh!! very2 cantik oo da view i tell u..

[mlm tia brapa nmpak lar.. my cam w910i so lame]

[da view from our room]

then da next day,

breakfast at Penyu Restaurant..

[Yum3x.. tasty fried noddles..n da soya bean, n apple juice]

[ni trip2 amik ckit2.. hahaha!]

after breakfast, mandi kolam.. wee~~

GONE!

I'm Gone - Jay Sean

I don't want to have to see you happy.
I can't even bare to see you smile.
Now-a-days I can't look in your eyes &...
Well I can but it takes a while
¯If you're strong?
Told a lot of white lies to hide it all.
But they're beginning to break me down,
Though I promise it's over now.

I'm gone.
I don't blame you at all.
'Cause after all the things that you did for me
Got beaten by temptation
I'm gone.
Girl you're better off alone.
I don't want you to see, the truth in me.

Try my best to keep it all together.
Tryna take it back to where we were.
Never been to good at keeping secrets,
Give you reasons but for what it's worth
Lemme go.
What the hell would make you look at me the same?
Used to say "We're unbrakeable."
But I just went & changed it all.

If I told you?
Could you live with that?
If I told you?
Could you live with that?
If I told you,
I couldn't live with that! I couldn't live with that!
Noooo!
I'd rather give you no excuses at all.

I'm gone.
I don't blame you at all.
'Cause after all the things that you did for me
Got beaten by temptation
I'm gone.
Girl you're better off alone.
I don't want you to see, the truth in me.

You gave everything & honestly it's every fault of mine.
To beg you for forgiveness just seems wrong.
See, leaving you is one thing
But you've got to realize:
Some things are best unspoken
So please don't ask me why!

Oh, you don't want to know
Oh, woah

I'm gone.
I don't blame you at all.
'Cause after all the things that you did for me
Got beaten by temptation
I'm gone.
Girl you're better off alone.
I don't want you to see, the truth in me.

If I told you?
Could you live with that?
If I told you?
Could you live with that?
If I told you,
I couldn't live with that! I couldn't live with that!
Noooo!
If I told you?
Could you live with that?
If I told you?
Could you live with that?
If I told you,
I couldn't live with that! I couldn't live with that!
Nooooooooooooo!

Oh, ooooh
No no
No no
Oooh, woaah
Ooooooooooooh
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Oh oh.
Oh woah, oh woooah.